To the Editors of the CRIMSON:

Recently we have heard several unwarranted and disappointing pronouncements that Harvard football is going to the elephants, and we are moved to protest this pessimism.

First, we examined records of the games against Tufts, Cornell, Columbia, and Dartmouth. There were two symmetrical trends: 1.) Harvard has won every alternate and even game, and has lost every odd game; 2) the Crimson has won exactly half of the home games and half of the away games. After projecting these trends as methods of analysis onto the remaining schedule of four games, we quickly saw two possibilities. By the first, Harvard must win the Princeton and Yale games, the sixth and eighth, and lose those against Penn and Brown. By the second, the Crimson must win one, lose one, and tie one of the three home games, and must tie the Princeton game. Clearly there is a contradiction. We found that compromise of the methods was the perfect solution to the contradiction. Since the trends are symmetrical, and since the Penn and Yale games hold symmetrical positions in both, it is obvious that Harvard cannot fail to lose the former and win the latter. Only the Brown and Princeton games might seem to be in doubt. However, the Brown game holds a symmetrical position amoung the three home games, and it must be a tie, since the Penn and Yale games are certain. Now Princeton stands in a win position by the first trend and in a tie position by the second. But it also stands in an exactly symmetrical position among all the away games. Therfore, Harvard must win in New Jersey... Charles F. Hosmer ' 59   James A. Field '59

Some readers may feel that the CRIMSON is a meany for withholding this letter, which was dated October 31. On the other hand, it effectively demonstrates that prudence is virtue and science is bunk, and that two sophomores have keen interest in our several grid classics.--Ed.