Wants have your life saved by a Smith girl? Need artificial respiration? Something or other announced as the Smith College Lifeguard will give an exhibition of swimming on Saturday--34 of 'em are scheduled to give out with the water ballet on Saturday in the M.I.T. pool. What's more, they're giving two performances--at 7:30 and 9:30 o'clock, just so they can "take care of everyone."

Miss Gertrude Goss, who could not be reached for comment last night, is the director of the 34 Smithies and the originator of the water ballot.

The release goes on to tell how a Miss Ann rose, "National AAU champion for the last three years" will do some exhibition diving. Tickets, it says here, will be on sale at the door.