(Ed. Note--The Crimson does not necessarily endorse opinions expressed in printed communications. No attention will be paid to anonymous letters and only under special conditions, at the request of the writer, will names be withheld. Only letters under 400 words can be printed because of space limitations.)

To the Editor of the Crimson:

No doubt you have heard of me and my great work in the cause of temperance. For several years I have been travelling about the country on the lecture platform. You may even be familiar with some of my better known talks, such as "Down With Drink," "Rum and Rebellion," and "Taking the B Out of Booze."

For three years I have had as my constant companion a faithful and pious friend, one Oscar Optimesque, who used to sit on the platform while I pointed him out as an example of the ravages of alcohol. Unfortunately, during the past summer, poor Oscar passed to his doom. I wonder if you could help me find some Harvard student to accompany me on my spring tour to replace poor Oscar, as I have heard on good information that Harvard students are possessed with the devil of drink. Hopefully yours, Rev. Jonah M. Wilde.

(Ed. Note: Afraid that too many Seniors will flood Reverend Wilde with applications for his outdoor job, the Crimson suggests he try Radcliffe, lately rumored to be a den for considerable sherry tippling.)