Scene: a heath near Lowell House. Enter Mr. Westcott with pail of sour cream followed by witches. Thunder and lightning.
Mr. W:--
Round about the tables go,
On the filthy dishes throw
Toast that under cold stone
Days and nights has thirty-one
In the Central Kitchen lain
With nasty foods of fancy name.
All:--
Double double boil and bubble
Cooking isn't worth the trouble.
Mr. W:--
Fillet of a fenny snake
For veal saute they may mistake,
Wormy haddock see thou fix
Sour cream on mornings six,
Gristly stew jardiniere
Seasoned with a wisp of hair,
Pork chops hardly edible,
Bouncing eggs incredible,
Chicken hacked instead of carved
For the inmates cruelly starved,
Weary cabbage dank and stark,
Gritty spinach digg'd i' the dark,
Bad eggs poached and under-boiled,
Rancid butter, silver soiled,
Vegetables all wet and runny,
Cockee Looke, buggy honey,
Demi-tasse in tepid cup.
Peace! the charm's wound up.
All:--
Double double boil and bubble
Cooking isn't worth the trouble.
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