Just what happened to our baseball men in Japan?

Now that the men are back safe and sound, in the more or less morally scrutinous anvirons of Cambridge the stories are frying thick which tell of eastern nights made enchanting by "geisha girls" and Nipponese potions, which furnish ample apology for the discouraging exhibition of our National pastime, to the subjects of His Imperial Majesty.

Of course some of the perennial insiders want to hook up the Roosevelt administration with the demise of the Crimson nine. Wild rumors now in the air say that President Roosevelt became suddenly solicitous of his international relations and sent a hurry-up radiogram to Coach Chauncey et cle. telling him to take it a bit easy. After winning five straight games in Hawaii, one can see that things looked pretty gloomy for peaceful relations with Japan.

So one story goes that the First Man of the land throwing caution to the winds and disregarding the horrible example of the 1919 White Sox, deliberately ordered the team representing his Alma Maler to toss a few games overboard while guests of the land of the cherry blossoms.

But this wild report seems to be only a flimsy excuse and perhaps the last faint touches of a sake hangover. The disconcerting presence of geisha girls seems to find a good deal of favor when one asks the why and wherefore. After all, Americans are not too numerous in Japan and the prospect of spending a pleasant few hours with a bunch of Harvard ball-players must have made many a comely Japanese maiden forget her afternoon prayers.

From the little tidbits that drift into our hands now and then, it is quite apparent that the ball team took more than a passing interest in the Japanese girls and what is told of open-air baths and bar-room entertainers furnishes plenty of excuse for the six defeats.

You can't mix a winning ball team with geisha girls and have a winning ball team left. And when you add a dash of fried eels for lunch and a bit of raw fish for dinner, the result is appalling. That was another thing that was bound to threw a nine off its stride. They say that you could get cooked food but it consisted of fish heads with the eye-balls served up as a delicacy. Even roast prime ribs of beef an just would have been welcome.

The only event that even threatened excitement occurred in Tokio on September 1, when a minor earthquake shook the chairs in the rooms. Memories of the Deacon's Masterpiece came to the minds of the Crimson squad when it was recalled that this was the ninth anniversary of the terrible earthquake day.

Tidbits From Tokio

About all the Japanese that the players could assimiliate was "Ikuradesuke?" Meaning in plain English "How much?"...Another word which often came in handy when the allowances were at the breaking point was "Mo-sukoshi." All of which is more significant as "a little more"...If the morals of geisha girls left much to be desired they were certainly compensated for by the taxi regulations. It seems that there is an unfortunate taboo on escorting ladies home in taxis after midnight. So the procedure was to send the poor girls home alone...At least the taxi fares were reasonable. The barter system is in full force and you try one fellow after another until you get the best buy. It all averages about 25 miles for $.75...All the members of the Keio University nine knew the words to the Maine "Stein Song" (poor things) and so the Harvard team returned the compliment by learning their school song and using it as a war-cry on the trip home...That trip back was uneventful and Captain-elect Dick Maguire was the only one who found the tossing of the ship disturbing...Craig Woodruff furnished the humor on the journey, and caused Frank Owen, one of the two sophomores no little consternation on the bus trip home. He was careful to warn the lady setting beside Owen continually to watch her pocketbook. BY TIME OUT.