When life's last thesis is written,

And learning is tucked in his bed;

When all of the book worms have bitten

Their last of what sages have said;

When Widener's completely forsaken,

Except for the man who checks coats;

And the last Ph.D. has been taken;

When culture has sowed her wild oats;

Then let us remember the vernal

Vicissitudes, most of them kind;

Yes, let us make pleasure diurnal--

Regarding an orderly mind.

Let us laugh at the void which is culture.

The massive proportions of wit;

And be free from the wormy sepulcher,

Which comes to the mentally fit. --Reginald De Puyster Advocate.

To those who have suggested for inclusion among additions to the Radcliffe library "Why We Behave Like Human Beings", one may suggest "Easy Steps For Little Feet" evidently published for their benefit in the March issue of a local periodical.

Those there are who take their caviar

At Childs.

Some prefer to take their pretzeis

At the Guard.

The Sahara may be fair

But it isn't even there

That one names his favorite lair.

REFRAIN

It's the good old, grand old Splendid

Where Hortense eats buttered toast.

It's the good old, grand old Splendid

Which is Northern Cambridge's boast.

There are those who eat their filet in

At Locke's,

There are those who drink Pickwick

At the Ritz.

But it is just the same,

Waffles by another name,

Look at Agnes, do! Exclaim,

That Diana's put to shame!

REFRAIN

At the good old, grand old Splendid,

Where we watch them with their swains

At the good old grand old Splendid,

Watch our vest for coffee stains etc.

It seems there was once a person who though that football was not a disease, except of sport writers, who thought that "bridge" was over emphasized as well as education, who believed that the Harvard of today is a fairly decent place despite the Liberal Club, the Lampoon, the final clubs, two or three others and the fact that Coolidge is still living away from home, who had a vague idea Boston was more a state of the mind than the mind of a state, who, in spite of his being averse to the traffic on Harvard Square met it half way....