The day of tyrants is over: Constantine is off again, Franz Joseph is dead, Lloyd George has resigned and the Kaiser is married. Only one of the old crew of autocrats is still in full control of his subjects, and that is M. Paul Poiret, ruler of the world's better half. A whim of this foreign autocrat's and the appearance of civilization is changed without a murmur.
Worse even than this is M. Poiret's complete usurpation of the office of Honored Custodian of Better Times. An edition of Le Temps tells him that industry in America is very low and with true French thoughtfulness he undertakes the remedy. A mandolin, a creation, two ripped seams four pins and a panel. Three days later that mythical personage referred to in all the best fashion plates as milady, gives her clothes to the scullery maid, and starts a considerable circulation of bills by purchasing a new wardrobe of the latest arrivals from Paris. Within a week, American industry is running overtime; more bills are circulating, prices rise, and prosperity returns. All because of a panel and four pins.
However, of late the custom of tours, presidential and otherwise has become firmly rooted and M. Poiret is never behind the times. Accordingly he undertook a tour of America. The first objectionable feature was the Statue of Liberty; the lady was the first in his experience who did not recognize his ways; could it be that she was America's ideal.
Then the king landed. He was met by a camera of the True News Corporation, and a small committee of welcome. The welcome was satisfactory but "la mode" was not. The latest importations had stimulated American industry but M. Poiret did not like them. He strongly objected to the popular French perfume and the most costly Parisien hats. "American women have not ze sense of beauty: Zey do not even like monkey fur."
Now he leaves for his throne, "with regret at departing from such a a fairyland." Where has he been? Whom has he met? So far as we know he has dined on the work of the best French chefs: and visited all the French tailors. Perhaps America is not so hopeless after all.
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The Student Vagabond