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Communication

Why Not "Leak Investigations 1"?

(We invite all men in the University to submit communications on subjects of timely interest, but assume no responsibility for sentiments expressed under this head.)

To the Editors of the CRIMSON:

We note with delight your editorial entitled "Compulsory Latin Must Go," as it seems to us the statement of a sage educational policy and is clearly the work of a man who knows the classics well and only turns from them after giving them a thorough trial.

We beg to hope that this editorial is only the first of a series waging a campaign for the new education in schools and colleges. We eagerly look forward for instance to a damnation of higher mathematics. It is such a useless study. What chance will a Wall Street clerk ever have of applying his calculus to his life-work? And then, too, you know it is so dreadfully difficult. Men sometimes spend thirty consecutive minutes pondering over a lot of mysterious signs and symbols--really, it is pitiful!

Then take the field of history. Don't you think the study ought to be limited to the great events of the current year? Leak Investigation 1, for example, ought to be a very popular course. Since it has been proved that history never repeats itself, it is ridiculous to study events of the past. The history of events previous to 1900 should be thrown out of the curriculum, if for no other reason than that it unquestionably overtaxes the undergraduate's memory--already sufficiently strained in keeping his tea dance engagements in proper order.

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I have just one more suggestion to make. Don't you think that some noted high school teacher should re-write such antiquated authors as Bacon, Shakespere, and Ben Jonson, putting them into up-to-date American English and giving them an American code of morality? It is so annoying to have to bother with an old idiom. It is for this reason, too, that a modern writer should tell us all about Rome for he not only is in a better position to judge of the life of the first century A.D. than would be a Pliny the Younger or a Juvenal, but he would give the information in so accessible a way.

Progress toward the summum bonum in education has been slow during the last five thousand years but nevertheless it has been encouraging. We may trust the time will soon come when the great high schools of the country will give courses in merchandising, emphasizing the practical side of it, of course, as for example, teaching the eager youth of the country how to dispose of dry goods in the basement for five dollars that goes begging on the first floor at two dollars and fifty cents.

May we all live to see the day when such courses as the following will be taught in Cambridge. They are certainly useful and yet they will not unduly strain the student's mind if he is careful of himself during the summer: Economics 303, or Advanced Muckraking; Geology 93, or the Geological Significance of the Egg of the Domestic Hen; Comme II Faut 17b, or the study of Male Headgear, Civilian and Military.

If you will be logical you must needs agree that the humanities must go. If you are in need of arguments you might use the following in some future editorial: a university is essentially like a pickle factory in this respect; it is to be judged by its product. And an examination of the careers of the men who have studied the humanities demonstrated conclusively that these studies have survived their usefulness. Any system that turns out such intellectual pigmies as Lord Macaulay or a Gladstone deserves just what the twentieth century gives it--derision. A. L. GARDNER, JR., '17.

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