"FOR once in my life," I thought through the rehearsals,
"That fickle jade, Fortune, has used me quite well."
You see I'd been cast for a doting old father,
And "Alice, his daughter," had fallen to Nell.
My thoughts of the future were dreams of elysium
As, musing, I thought of the scene full of bliss,
When wheedling consent from her fond, foolish parent,
She clinches the thing with a sweet little kiss.
Two acts had been played midst a shower of plaudits,
Our scene came at last, and, scarce daring to speak,
I gently bent down to the blushing young beauty,
And pressed a soft kiss on the velvety cheek.
On that cheek, once a desert of lilies and roses,
Instanter I see an oasis appear;
My mouth has a taste of cosmetics, rouge, powder,
That can't be removed by a gallon of beer.
The actors all snicker, the audience titter,
A mild sort of lunacy steals o'er my brain
As I solemnly swear, SOTTO VOCE, "Well, hang me
If I e'er take a part where there's kissing again!"
M. L.
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