“Wanna try the new Grateful Burger?”

The HUDS employee at Quincy Grille smiles over a platter of cuboidal tidbits. “It’s a healthy and sustainable alternative to your traditional beef burger,” he says.

As a carnivore from Los Angeles, arguably the vegan capital of the world, I am not about to waste time nor calories on another quinoa, kale, kombucha, or beetroot concoction.

But the HUDS employee doesn’t give up. As I’m halfway out the door, he calls out: “USDA chuck and sirloin beef, portabellas, and [insert litany of spices he probably made up]!” I don’t know if I have ever done a quicker 180 in my life. That’s what meat can do to me, I guess.

So I let the vendor take his shot with this “Grateful Burger.” Boy, was I grateful.

I know this particular adjective is highly contentious and aurally displeasing, but there’s only one way to describe the new HUDS special: MOIST! After one bite, a flood of beef, mushroom, and spicy juices were flowing into my gullet. It looked moist and tasted moist; even the bun was like a moist sponge on a moist summer day.

Most importantly: Each burger saves our planet 250 gallons of water, as more than 1800 gallons are needed to grow a single pound of pure beef.

Mouth feeling a bit dry? Head to your house dhall and give the new moist Grateful Burger a try.