Thriller
Nine best friends. One blocking group. Someone must float. Get ready for sabotaged psets, secret midnight meetings at ABP, and calls to parents’ lawyers. Lies. Betrayal. Bitchiness. This Housing Day, no one is safe.
Sports Film
From Newell Boathouse comes the story of a crew team unlike any other. They were a diverse group of rowers who hailed from Exeter, Andover, and Choate. But when the Head of the Charles rolled around, they overcame their differences to become a team. Against all odds, they found a way to bond over beer, BU girls, and interest in the government concentration. Come March, they all ended up in Eliot, just across the river from the boathouse, because Harvard housing is “completely random.”
Romantic Comedy
They were Harvard’s most unlikely pair. She was a folklore and mythology concentrator who gave money to the panhandlers outside CVS. He was studying economics and had a signed poster of N. Gregory Mankiw hanging over his bed. But when he needed a service project to put on his resume and she discovered that the market value of an extensive knowledge of Norse poems was negligible, they realized the one thing they couldn’t fight was fate.
Mystery It’s 8 a.m. The knock will be coming any minute now. Eight freshmen sit in their common room, eyeing the door, drops of sweat rolling down their necks. Whose mascot will be on the other side of that door when the time comes? Which of the eight will be to blame if it’s the quad? Find out in this once-in-a-lifetime viewing experience.
Foreign Language Film
A touching story of bromance across language barriers, Jorge, Vlad, and Jan met at FIP and became fast friends while learning how to grind and use American ATM machines. It didn’t matter that they couldn’t really understand each other; their Hispanic-Russo-German friendship blossomed anyway as they bonded over their mutual disdain for American football and the grammatical inconsistencies of the English language. When it came time to block, there was no question that they would be together forever, although they were slightly irked to discover that the fourth floor of Lamont was not a housing option.
Inspirational True Story
He was rejected by the cool kids, couldn’t really talk to the ladies. He was a loser, and everyone knew it. When it came time to find a blocking group, his only option was his fellow science nerds. But he never gave up. He kept writing code, no matter what the jocks said about him. Then he invented Facebook. Even when you don’t win at blocking, don’t let that stop you from winning at life.
Rated R(vard). Coming March 8 to a theater near you.
