The Hopeful Flounder Lie flat against the floor and lift yourself with your arms. Arch your back and raise your
By M. AIDAN Kelly
May 17, 2007
The Hopeful Flounder
Lie flat against the floor and lift yourself with your arms. Arch your back and raise your head to the sky. Cry out for joy, you beautiful bastard—you deserve everything you’ve got!
The Toppling Tower
Amputate your right leg. Using both arms, try to maintain perfect balance. Will your veins to stop the torrential bleeding from your stump. Also, make sure your face is fixed in absolute rapture.
The Naughty Satyr
Dude, that satyr would lift its tail for anyone. Go find that naughty satyr and give it the reaming it demands. Then fall on your back in ecstasy/exhaustion, as Walt has done here. Dude.
The Rising Spirit
Bend your right knee and extend your left leg. Join your hands in peaceful submission, lift your face to the heavens and...what’s that? Is that a...OH FUCK, a pigeon just shat on my face, oh man that is DISGUSTING.
The Simple Stretch
Take your right hand and touch your right heel. Tilt your head and arch your back slightly. Levitate seven inches off the ground. Fully extend your left arm. Remember to breathe! And to levitate!
