The Harvard Cancer Society (HCS) hosted its second annual Valentine’s Day Date Auction last Saturday in the Quincy JCR, raising over $1,100 for cancer research. But can money really buy you love?
HCS president Natasia A. de Silva ’08 reluctantly says no. “The event is for charity, not for love.” Yet she insists, “I can tell you, there were actual romantic dates last year,” giving hope to the love-sick hopefuls looking for their own cure this coming Valentine’s Day.
The show began rather dryly with two somewhat awkward jocks shyly shaking their derrières for a meager $15. However, the humorous and flamboyant antics of the night’s emcee, Harrison R. Greenbaum ’08, offered some needed comic relief. He even referenced a certain SNL skit to familiarize the audience with the finer points of charity. “Don’t put your dick in the box,” Greenbaum joked, “I don’t think we can donate that to cancer.”
Newly elected Undergraduate Council President Ryan A. Petersen ’08 went for $75, while the most expensive bid of the night was $188.50 for Debora M. Amanti ’08.
The weirdest moment of the night was undoubtedly when a certain creepo, after placing a winning bid on a scantily clad student performing an elaborate striptease, then seized the stage and put a special date up for sale: Christopher N. Hanley ’07 promised a trip to New York to a five-star restaurant, and backstage access to a Broadway show. Hey, it’s for charity.
In the end, an $110 bid from Lena Chen ’09, who is also a Crimson editor—who went for $35 herself—secured the engagement. Who would have thought curing cancer could be so sexy?
