Under the subject heading “Who’s pulling an all-nighter in Lamont tonight??” the previously defunct “FMspeak-l” internal mailing list experienced nothing short of a renaissance this past Sunday and Monday, attracting posts from FM staffers new and old.
In lieu of a conventional Endpaper, FM presents you with the highlights of this e-mail chain, started by nocturnal FM Associate Editor Sam Teller ’08. More than any first-person essay could ever do, the follow gives a colorful account of Reading Period in real time.
Live blog away!
From: Sam Teller
To: fmspeak-l
Date: May 14, 2006 3:22 PM
Subject: [FMspeak-l] Who’s pulling an all-nighter in Lamont tonight?? YESSSSS
From: Samuel Conrad Scott
Date: May 14, 2006 3:23 PM
Who’s getting their study on in the Loker Reading Room in Widener, where everyone stares angrily at you if you turn the pages of your book too loudly?
From: April Yee
Date: May 14, 2006 3:30 PM
Who’s looking at a dude wearing a navy, yellow-striped bow tie with a bottle of raspberry-lime Poland Springs nestled by his hip?
Location: Widener.
Atmosphere: Pretentious
Yours,
April
From: Evan Rodning Johnson
Date: May 14, 2006 3:48 PM
True story: earlier today at brunch, some Dunsterites and I were actually competing to see who had the most relatives coming in forgraduation, and even created rules to give bonus points for those with no siblings, and deductions for those who lived within a radius of 10
miles of Harvard Yard.
From: Aria Laskin
Date: May 14, 2006 3:48 PM
im in the cabot house library. i just sent my mom a fetching evangelical e-card. ive actually sort of reached a state of inner tranquility. namaste.
aria
From: Alwa Amanda Cooper
Date: May 14, 2006 5:02 PM
April just walked past me. First sign of motile human life in 2.3 hours. However, she didn’t see me, so I may be blending in with the rest of the foliage. Worrisome.
From: Sam Teller
Date: May 14, 2006 5:03 PM
My name’s FM and I get real paid
I’ll rob your mansion and I’ll kill your maid
Give me lemons I make lemonade
I rock from LA to Miami-Dade
From: Leon Neyfakh
Date: May 14, 2006 8:05 PM
please unsubscribe me from this list
From: Leon Neyfakh
Date: May 14, 2006 8:07 PM
and by that i mean can someone please unsubscribe me from sam teller? his dick is literally in my ear right now
From: Elizabeth Weiss Green
Date: May 14, 2006 8:19 PM
that’s weird, Leon. you have such small ears...
From: Leon Neyfakh
Date: May 14, 2006 8:45 PM
is there supposed to be sound ?? i can’t tell, dick in my ear
From: Alwa Amanda Cooper
Date: May 15, 2006 12:08 AM
Ooops. I meant to send something to the list, but did not - the long and the short of it, Sam Teller just tackled someone in the Lamont third-floor reading room. It’s pretty ridiculous in here.
From: Sam Teller
Date: May 15, 2006 11:50 AM
You know when you sneeze or something and then your eyes start to water and then someone you know walks up and is like “what’s wrong” and you’re like “nothing, just sneezed” and they’re thinking to themselves “yeah right what a baby why don’t you go cry some more”—that just happened!!
From: Ashley Marie Pletz
Date: May 15, 2006 12:02 PM
i love how fmspeak is really just a venue for real-time minute-by-minute updates on sam teller’s life. what about me? im eating a cheese and salami sandwich in the dining hall, and im lactose intolerant. craaazy! fo’ realz, yo. i’ll be sure to let you know how it turns out in 10 minutes.
From: Elizabeth Goodwin
Date: May 15, 2006 12:21 PM
You know what’s also sad? When you start a paper on a saturday and it’s due sunday at 5 so you start requesting books from Widener’s depository and then you have to turn the paper in and you start getting all these emails like “Your book is in, come pick it up!” from Widener on Monday and you kind of want to cry because you only had 4 sources (one of them a website) and it was a research paper.
From: Matthew Aidan Kelly
Date: May 15, 2006 12:37 PM
Liz, be quiet. FMspeak is for liveblogging Sam Teller’s life, and nothing else.
Sam Teller ’08, Samuel C. Scott ’08, April H.N. Yee ’08, Evan R. Johnson ’06, Aria S.K. Laskin ’08, Alwa A. Cooper ’08, Leon Neyfakh ’07, Elizabeth W. Green ’06. Ashley M. Pletz ’08, Liz C. Goodwin ’08, and M. Aidan Kelly ’08 are staff members of The Crimson. They live in Lamont Library.
