If your most faithful Saturday night buddies are H and C (hydrogen and carbon), maybe you should consider adding THC to your speed-dial. It’s time to put all your filtrations and recrystallizations aside, because the best use of the side-arm flask has come to Harvard: the OrgoBong. An 8-step guide to chemical fame:
1. Bring a backpack to your next Orgo lab. Wear items that make you blend in with your classmates, such as a pin saying “Chemistry is for Lovers” or “You Raise My Boiling Point.” Avoid attention at all costs.
2. A few hours into the lab, sneak into the back room. Look for the following items: plastic tubing, a syringe, one side-arm flask, one fretted funnel, and one medium-sized rubber stopper with two holes in the top (see photo). Take the above and place it gently in your bag.
3. When lab is over, return to your room and draw the curtains shut. Assemble the stolen equipment on a clean, dry workspace—preferably near a fan, so that work can quickly become pleasure.
4. Fill the flask halfway up with room-temperature water—not from your roommate’s Nalgene.
5. Insert the rubber stopper in the big opening of the flask.
6. Take the funnel and syringe, and place them firmly in the two holes in the stopper.
7. Place the plastic tubing around the little nubby opening on the side of the flask.
8. Fill the bottom of the funnel with your favorite illicit substance, bring out a lighter, pop in a trippy CD, and enjoy!
A last suggestion: be creative! A bong is only one of the many enjoyable paraphernalia made possible by the Organic Chemistry Lab. Past projects include a pipe and a life-sized, space shuttle-themed hotbox. Next Week: Special Brownies in the Bio Labs’s Thermal Cyclers...
